As part of sex education research in The South African, they interviewed UK teens about why they don’t talk about sex with their parents. Images of great shame are at the top of the list. Parents stated that they had no idea when or how these talks were taking place, and instructors reported significant challenges in engaging parents in sex education for their children.
Therefore, talk to children about sensitive topics is always one of the biggest challenges for parents because lots of parents don’t know how to say it in a way that can help their children can understand the issue effectively but at the same time still keep the talking atmosphere warm and easy.
However, parents cannot become so frightened that they silently watch their children groping around the world around themselves, especially at puberty with lots of physiological and psychological changes, and children need you more than ever.
This article will help you better understand ways of talking to kids about porn with 5 tips to talk to children about sensitive topics (porn).
5 tips to talk to children about sensitive topics (porn)
Constantly self-updating information
Before talk to children about sensitive topics (porn), you need to update your own information to understand some issues such as:
- How widespread is pornography nowadays? Where does it most easily appear?
- What is the prevalence of kids being exposed to pornography?
- What are the negative effects of pornography on teenagers?
- Why are kids most susceptible to porn addiction?
- What is child pornography? How do the predators approach your children?
Knowing how to react when you know your child has seen pornography is also an essential step in preparation when discussing sensitive issues with your child. If in the process of talking, you discover that your child has watched pornography both intentionally or accidentally, what will you do?
A huge mistake is that most parents blame and punish their children when they know they are viewing pornography. Such reactions are harmful to the parent-child relationship, especially when your child perceives the negative consequences of discussing pornography with trusted adults as being yelled at and being punished.
That’s why you need to update the information yourself to understand that your child is at the age of gender curiosity. You should understand that curiosity about sex is a natural part of your child’s development and so don’t yell at him just because he’s curious about sex.
Once discovered, your child may feel embarrassed, upset, or scared. This is a common thing that every child will feel, but how you react can make a big difference. Actions that demonstrate positive communication, such as parents thanking children for confiding in them, asking questions, and encouraging more open dialogue, are helpful in turning tense conversations into warmer ones.
Consider using age-appropriate language
How to talk to kids about pornography varies within an age range. Each age will have a different way of perceiving information, so you need to select and provide information at an appropriate level so that your child can easily comprehend it. For example, since most children aged 12-18 have heard of pornography or even knew it, it would be unnecessary for you to define pornography, instead, more realistic if you emphasize the devastating harm of pornography to your child.
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However, for 9-11-year-olds, the definition of pornography plays an important role. You can define pornography as images of adults having sex, and there are lots of adults who enjoy viewing these types of images, as it was originally created for adults, not children.
But with another age, such as 5-8 years old, at this age the children are still innocent, not exposed to the outside world as much as 9-11 years old, you can consider another approaching way. For example, you can tell your child that pornography is sexually explicit images or videos, represented by pictures of naked adults. Some adults love to see these pictures, but they are not meant for children. So I don’t want you to look at the pictures if you happen to come across them.
Regardless of age, one suggestion is to encourage parents to use the word “pornography” openly, rather than using other names to refer to pornography indirectly.
Timing: Discuss porn when it is the first time your child uses the Internet
When your kids first access the Internet, that’s the age you should start warning them about pornography. Every child deserves and desperately needs to be warned about the dangers of pornography and have the skills to refuse it.
You should also continue to discuss porn, and gender in general, with your child so you can deal with any new questions and situations that arise. You should make it clear to your child how serious pornography is to them.
Besides, don’t let your child wander about gender. Providing age-appropriate information educational on sensitive issues such as gender issues as well as books that children can refer to will limit their children’s self-studying online, where millions of malicious content await after those gender keywords.
Discuss with your child the use of harmful content filtering tools
Talking is one of the best ways to help your child stay away from pornography but you shouldn’t be subjective because your child can be very curious (especially when you are not around).
To ensure your child’s online environment is safe and healthier, you should consider using an additional online content filtering tool – considered by many parents as one of the best free parental control software to hide 15 types of harmful content on the Internet, including:
- Horrifying content like gore, accidents, ghosts, violence, murder, terrorism, etc
- Content about stimulants, addictive substances such as alcohol, beer, marijuana, drugs, etc
- Content with aggressive elements, hurting others like Hate speech
This free porn blocker extension can help to minimize your child’s access to harmful content, ensuring a healthy online environment for your child but at the same time, not invading their privacy rights.
Don’t forget that before you use any tool, have a frank conversation with your child about why you are using it, such as the content filtering tool here will protect kids from porn and other harmful content, but do not read messages or track your child’s online activity at all.
Constantly creating a healthy and friendly conversation environment
Conversation involves talking and listening, which means you have to create a place where your kids know they can talk to you about anything confusing on the Internet and you’ll listen to them.
A lot of parents have an authoritarian parenting style. This means that when the rules are made, they must be obeyed, not argued. For example, parents forbid their children from watching pornographic content. These rules are given and must be followed by order, with no explanation and no room for discussion.
Instead, emulate today’s modern parents with an Authoritative parenting style. The authoritative parenting style is that parents often guide their children about what is appropriate and inappropriate for their children, about not posting personal information on social networks, and having convincing EXPLANATION for this.
Especially during puberty, children go through a series of physical and mental changes, parenting styles play an important role in shaping the child’s later maturation process, as well as having a significant impact on your relationship with your child during this extremely sensitive time.
This is extremely important in the virtual world when your child is very susceptible to external influences such as being easily deceived by bad guys to get personal information. Your child is also vulnerable to the negative effects of inappropriate content such as pornography, which affects their psychology and behavior.
Wise modern parents are always proactive in bringing the best for their children. To better protect your child from all porn sites, for all internet-connected devices your child use, you should pre-order Wifi Device, becoming the first parents to own the solution which 24/7 protects your kids from harmful websites. Best prices are always available for early birds!
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